For lots of reasons that don't bear close examination here, I haven't had "girlfriends" since Junior High. Oh, there were a couple of girls I ran around with in High School and college, but they weren't the sorts of relationships that stood the test of time. They were broad, but they weren't deep.
It is something I get sad about when I hear others talk about a deep, abiding friendship with someone that goes back to childhood, and I don't have to look too far to find lots of ways that this is a real deficit in my life.
My mother is in a "Sewing Circle" that started out with 14 women over 50 years ago -- and they still meet twice a month. Their number is dwindling now, of course -- 3 of that group have died, and a couple others have been relocated by their children out of the city. But that little group has gone through every change and challenge life has thrown them together, and there are no secrets in the Sewing Circle.
Over the past year, though, I've made some friends in cyberspace. I used to be one of those folks who didn't believe "non-3-D" relationships could be meaningful or true, but now I'm a believer.
This group of friends (24 of us -- 23 women and 1 man) are from 19 states. A few of us have been lucky enough to meet in person, and rather than feeling awkward it has felt like a reunion with an old friend one's not seen in a long time.
The friends in this group have shared their struggles, their hopes, their dreams, their frustrations. We've asked others to pray for people we loved, and we've worried over others who seem to be facing insurmountable difficulties.
I've had phone conversations with most, either about silly things or when there was a need to pour one's heart out privately. These friends inhabit my thoughts, and I have found that I no longer give a long explanation to people that "I'm in this online support group" -- now I just say, "I've got this friend in New Jersey....."
I can't speak for anyone else in this group of strangers who found each other in an unlikely way, but for me? I am suffering from an embarrassment of riches because of these relationships.
That I may never actually meet all of them in person bothers me not in the least. They inhabit a place in my heart that overcomes distance.
We laugh, we scold, we challenge -- and we CARE.
And honey? That's what friends are for.
A place for me to get out of my head the Marbles that run through it on occasion.
5 comments:
Cyber friends have been a real blessing. Who would have thought years ago that we'd have so many real friends that we've never seen?
love ya, dear one. ♥
I do believe that there is something inherently wonderful in having such a support network in so-called 'cyberspace'. In my darkest moments, it's been a safe haven to tap into *any* hour of the day. Sadly, not something that happens too often in 'real time'. Friends are busy with their lives, phone calls have to be swift and to the point. I revel in my *real* friends who reside in my ol' computer every day!
The people of RML have been as supportive of me as anyone in my everyday life and most of the time more so! When I say my prayers, I thank God for RML and Eleanor, who started it all! K :)
I'm just really happy to have gotten to know you, it's been a huge blessing to me.
Since having cyber friends on RML I've had this thought. We can be so real about things on the board. We probably know each other better in some ways than our '3D' friends & family do.
Looking forward to meeting you in person one day :-)
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